It’s not just adults who take on caregiving roles. Children as young as 6 or 7 can be found caring for parents, grandparents, and siblings, often in ways that go unnoticed.
These young caregivers may hide their responsibilities, not wanting to reveal their struggles to teachers, doctors, or relatives for fear of embarrassment, judgment, or consequences.
When young caregivers do speak up, they share how the weight of their responsibilities impacts both their physical and mental health. They often feel exhausted, stressed, and overwhelmed by the constant worry. Balancing their own lives—school, friends, sports, or social activities—while caregiving can feel impossible, leaving them with little time to care for themselves or even get a full night’s sleep.
How big is the problem?
The issue is bigger than many realize. In Canada alone, research from the University of Alberta shows that over a quarter of youth between the ages of 15 and 19 are providing care for family members or friends. This equates to nearly 600,000 teens devoting at least 21 hours a week to caregiving, which often limits their opportunities and affects their future.
Like older caregivers, these young people need support and guidance. They may not have developed the skills or coping mechanisms to handle the emotional and practical challenges that come with caregiving, especially when faced with financial strain like student debt.
A personal story: Lisa Potter
Take the story of Lisa Potter from Edmonton. Lisa began caring for her grandparents when she was just eight years old and continued until she was 15. Her grandparents were dealing with serious medical conditions such as Parkinson’s disease, Leukemia, and Alzheimer’s disease, all of which were completely foreign to her at the time.
“I was exposed to aging, death, cancer, and Alzheimer’s at a very young age,” Potter recalls. “I didn’t understand why Grandpa couldn’t follow along with my stories or why he forgot what we were talking about. It was confusing and difficult to comprehend as a child.” Fortunately, Potter’s family worked together, so she didn’t bear the full burden alone. “My mom, aunt, and uncle shared the caregiving responsibilities, which meant I still had time to be a kid.”
Although her family was a big help, Potter’s involvement was significant. She would spend time with her grandparents, accompany her mom to their appointments, and even gave up her bedroom for her aunt when needed. “One time, I had to run to a hotel front desk in my bathing suit to call an ambulance after Grandpa fell by the pool”. Even though she was young, she was there, helping.
Involving the school
Schools play an important role in supporting young caregivers. Teachers and guidance counsellors are often skilled at recognizing when a student is struggling and can help by offering accommodations like extra tutoring, flexible deadlines, or mentorship. However, it’s important to approach this carefully. Young caregivers may be embarrassed to reveal their situation to peers or teachers, so these discussions should be handled with sensitivity.
School staff may also have connections to outside professionals who can provide additional support. They could recommend counseling services or connect the family with local organizations that assist with caregiving. By working together with the family and community, schools can help relieve some of the pressure that young caregivers face.
Expanding support beyond the family
While school is often the first place people think of when it comes to supporting young caregivers, a child’s caregiving journey is influenced by many people in their life. Extended family members, friends, neighbours, and community organizations can also play a key role in helping ease the burden.
Grandparents, aunts, uncles, or close family friends can offer valuable support, not just by pitching in with caregiving, but by providing emotional stability. For example, grandparents or other adults in the family might take over responsibilities for a weekend or more, allowing the child a break. It’s also important for these extended family members to check in regularly with the child, making sure they feel heard, supported, and not overwhelmed.
Neighbours or community members can lend a hand by offering to help with tasks like grocery shopping, cleaning, or babysitting. Simply recognizing the child’s efforts and offering encouragement can go a long way in showing that they aren’t alone.
For parents or family friends with connections to local resources, it can be helpful to research respite care programs, community support groups, or youth organizations that offer breaks for young caregivers. These services can provide much-needed relief and a chance for the child to focus on their own life, if only for a little while.
Signs to watch for, and how to help
If you suspect that a young child in your life, or sphere of influence, is being forced to feel obligated to take on too much as a caregiver, there are ways to help without overwhelming them or invading their privacy. Here are some practical ways to help:
1) Keep a watchful eye: Look for signs of fatigue, stress, or avoidance of social activities. These could be indicators that the child is struggling to cope.
2) Explore support services: Research community programs or resources that could offer the
family respite care or financial aid.
3) Support discreetly: Offer help in a way
that protects their privacy and avoids embarrassing them.
4) Involve other adults: Connect with the child’s family members or caregivers to see how you
can assist.
5) Talk to professionals: A confidential conversation with a teacher, doctor, or counsellor may uncover additional support options.
Finding the positives
Though caregiving can be overwhelming for young people, it can also nurture important life skills like empathy, responsibility, and resilience. Potter, for instance, looks back on her experience positively. “I would absolutely step in again to care for my loved ones,” she says. “It’s my responsibility to care for those who have cared for me my whole life.”
Caregiving may be tough, but with the right support from family, schools, and the community, young caregivers can find a balance between their responsibilities and their own lives. Empowering these children ensures they aren’t forgotten and that they grow stronger through the challenges they face.
Rick Lauber is a freelance writer. He has written two books, Caregiver’s Guide for Canadians and The Successful Caregiver’s Guide.
Photos: iStock. CanStock.
