Accompanying an elder for doctors for medical appointments, annual check-ups, or simple prescription refills isn’t as straightforward as it sounds. Here’s how to stay calm and carry on!
Doctor’s visits—one of the most common responsibilities of a family caregiver—but also one that can often can to logistical challenges, delays and family discussions and changes in care.
1) Countering reluctance: Often times, a senior may be resistant to having a caregiver alongside. As a son, daughter or accompanying friend, its wise to discuss plans and expectations in advance. Surprises or changes aren’t always welcome.
Avoid the more aggressive, “I will be joining you at the doctor’s office …”. Instead, try saying something like, “I’m hoping to come help out you’re your appointment tomorrow”
“I’m worried about you to getting there comfortably and I’d like to better understand what the doctor can help us with… and how I can best help you.” And suggest a lunch or a coffee afterwards if they’re up to it so there’s something nicer to look forward to.
Hint: Remember, there’s a big difference here between sharing personal feelings, concerns and wishes and demanding to be included.
2) Bring the parent’s health card: Without the proper health coverage (or medical insurance), the family caregiver/senior may be charged for the doctor’s time or, worse yet, Mom or Dad may not even be seen by the doctor.
Hint: Keep a copy of the person’s health card with you and make sure it’s up to date at all times.
3) List a senior’s health history: For a proper diagnosis, doctors will need to have detailed background information. Particularly when they haven’t seen this doctor or specialist before. Have health records transferred by referring doctors but be ready to explain current and past illnesses, hospitalizations, medications, allergies etc.
Hint: Check with the doctor’s office to confirm appointment times and to see if you need verbal or written consent from the patient to accompany them.
4) Take assistive devices: From walkers and wheelchairs to eye glasses and hearing aids – medical practitioners need to understand any that the senior will rely on.
Hint: Make sure optometry and audiologist appointments are up to date and prescriptions filled. Also change batteries in hearing aids on a regular basis as recommended.
5) Be prepared: Refresh yourself and be ready to share current symptoms, observations, and reactions to medications etc. Has Mom/Dad fallen? Are they experiencing pain (where is the pain, is it constant or intermittent, and how severe is it)? With Dad’s Alzheimer’s disease, he lost his ability to speak, but he would still flinch when experiencing pain or discomfort.
Hint: Are they having difficulties or changes with eyesight or hearing, mobility or eating habits. Detailed updates and reliable information will improve results.
6) List current medications: What is being taken, length of time taken, dosage and any “over-the-counter” medications, vitamins, and natural remedies.
Hint: Take pictures of bottles to confirm correct names and dosage.
7) Ask questions: Gaining information is critical for family caregivers. Don’t be shy to quiz the doctor and be sure you understand the prognosis in layman’s terms that you can pass on.
Hint: Write down doctor’s answers and recommended resources. A visit to the doctor can become stressful and information overload is common.
8) Draw on expertise: Doctors and nurses often know about assistive devices, eldercare programs and services, and/or healthcare specialists that your loved one could use.
Hint: There’s no shame in asking for help or guidance when you need it.
9) Be patient and allow for extra traveling time: Getting up, out and about may take time for getting ready. Colder weather means more time is needed to layer up. Unforeseen traffic tie-ups and vehicle problems can also delay arrival times. Keep your cell phone at the ready at all times. I remember chauffeuring Dad to an appointment and my car broke down. Thankfully could call the doctor’s office and rebook.
Hint: Know where the washrooms are – just in case and expect wait times at the doctor’s office or for lab or diagnostic tests. Bring a book, a snack a deck of cards and a bottle of water.
10) Pack a “hospital emergency bag”: Depending on the senior’s medical condition, hospital admission may become necessary. A hospital emergency bag in the trunk of the car should contain a complete care binder, important documents (e.g. the patient’s birth certificate, health care card, and copies of Guardianship and/or Trusteeship orders), emergency contacts. Pack PJ’s and comfy clothes. Think chargers, snacks and things to do.
Hint: Doesn’t hurt to carry a change of clothes with you in case of accidents or spills.
11) Understand the next step(s): Be mindful of what you and your loved one need to do after the appointment and make sure you have all the necessary requisitions. And we aware of any changes or symptoms everyone should be watching for.
Hint: Keeping others in the loop is key. Get ready to report back. Who should you share new information with?.
Stay calm and carry on…
With these simple tips I’m hoping you’ll be far better equipped to have a more fruitful ‘medical visit’ experience on your caregiving journey. After all, as Oprah once said… “Doing the best at this moment puts you in the best place for the next moment.”
Rick Lauber is a freelance writer. He has written two books, Caregiver’s Guide for Canadians and The Successful Caregiver’s Guide.
Photos: CanStock
